The Dark Night of Abstraction

I finally responded to the email Rev. Linda sent the week after I attended St. Johns. Here is her email and my response to help document this unfolding relationship with the church. I have a feeling that from a future perspective this will take on a totally different meaning for me than it does at this moment in my life. It could be a joke, a passing phase, more distraction from distraction or a pathetic rush back to the familiar to rekindle the incombustible.

David –Good to see you again Sunday. I have given our conversation some thought this week…..my responses at this juncture are to suggest several things: 1. spiritual counseling 2. some reading…like “The Search for Meaning” by Thomas H. Naylor, William H. Willimon and Magdalene R. Naylor, Abingdon Press, 1994. I have a copy you can borrow. Another would be Henri Nouwen’s books….I have this one Nouwen book which is a compilation of selected writings of his….this was put together after his death. He struggled with lots of things. He was a Roman Catholic priest…a Jesuit by training. I only mention that because that is his tradition and obviously his writings reflect that tradition. Although some have said of him that his parish was the world ---- I think that was true really. He apparently was very open to folk of various traditions of faith (and I mean beyond Christianity). Anyway, I suggest this one just to give you a flavor and see if some of his writings prod your soul…if so, then you can go deeper. Oh, and the name of it is “Henri Nouwen”, Orbis, 1998. I also have that. I would be happy to talk with you….either via phone or face to face or if it works out, both. A crisis of the empty soul takes time and energy to fill. I’m willing to try and help as I can. Take care. Rev. Linda

My response:

Rev. Linda, I went with your suggestion and started reading Nouwen's Inner Voice of Love. Paradoxically, I feel rather numb, more accurately, I am very conscious of something I am obviously trying not to be aware of. I would like to talk further, although I can't promise that I will be able to offer much clarity, but I welcome your assistance. I work from home one Tuesdays and Thursdays, what would be a convenient time to meet for you? David

We decided on a date but I don't know exactly how to prepare for our meeting or if to prepare at all. I want to maintain the momentum, although if don't know if I am being pulled back down into the dark night of abstraction or dragged upward out of this relativistic bog to the Real.